Happy New Year! This morning, Marriage365 shared: “Working on your marriage a little bit each day pays big dividends. The strongest couples, the happiest couples work on their marriage 365 days a year.” As you consider the New Year, what is one area of your marriage or relationship that you’d like to work on in 2019? A […]
marriage
Marriage Moment: 5 Strategies for Balancing Togetherness and Individuality
Many of us enter marriage anticipating working together as a team. But, how do we work together with our spouse and maintain our own voice, opinions and perspectives. This certainly can be challenging for many couples…to find this balance of togetherness and individuality. Those first few years of marriage are often a time of discovery […]
The Auxano Approach to Communication: Step 2
As the second part of a four-part series, it’s imperative that you read “The Auxano Communication Approach: Step 1” before reading any further. This approach to strengthening relationships is a four-step process that requires you to progress from one step to the next. Now, the second step of the Auxano Communication Approach© is to invite […]
The Auxano Approach to Communication: Step 1
Over the course of the next two weeks, I’ll share each step of the Auxano Communication Approach© in its own post. The entire approach is detailed in Chapter 13 of my book, The Stories We Tell Ourselves. In my previous post, “Your Spouse is Not Your Nemesis,” I discussed how important it is to the […]
Your Spouse is Not Your Nemesis
In my counseling practice, I use a particular psychological approach that helps married couples in conflict learn how to work together against a problem instead of either spouse seeing the other as the problem—even if only one spouse is the major problem within the relationship. To do this, I encourage my clients to learn how […]
Your Marriage, Your Problems
In After the Fight, therapist Daniel B. Wile wrote, “Choosing a marriage partner is choosing a set of problems.” You don’t consciously think about this fact when you’re dating. You tend to see what you want to see. When your brain is flooded with intoxicating chemicals, your judgment can be clouded (about the other person), […]
The Mirror of Marriage
In Chapter 10 of The Stories We Tell Ourselves, I wrote, “A spouse is a mirror who shows us characteristics of ourselves we would rather not see reflected back to us on a daily basis.” For instance, a wife may choose to react with an anger outburst, rather than talk calmly through conflict with her […]
