I remember the first time I went scuba diving. Though gearing up for the dive took some time, as soon as I plunged into the ocean, I knew the wait was worth the payoff. As the cool water engulfed me, I witnessed a very different and captivating world.
At forty feet below surface level, I witnessed stunning sea life and fantastic coral. As I kicked and swam through this underwater world, I was mesmerized.
But thirty minutes into the dive—I started to get a little bored. I hate to say that, but the novelty of the experience had begun to wear off ever so slightly. I returned to the surface.
Our guide on the boat asked me, “Why’d you get out so soon? Did you reach where the reef drops off? It’s a little deep and you have to work to get there, but man is it worth it.”
I stared at him rather dumbly. I placed my regulator (breathing apparatus) back in my mouth, smiled at my guide, and plunged back in. No way was I going to miss out on an experience like that.
Years later as I was working on The Stories We Tell Ourselves, this story came to mind. It was a perfect illustration of how most of our relationships tend to work, myself included.
We stay surface level, and that’s OK for a time, but the novelty wears off quickly. We may even give up on a relationship because we think we know all we need to about that person.
But if only we would dive deeper, we’d see how expansive and captivating their world truly is.
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